Thursday, September 13, 2007

Meet Corbin

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Corbin in a baby carriage.

We don't stray from the norm. We met in a "meat market", a company where people work 70 hours a week. Just short of being married to your job, you might as well date a co-worker to pass the time. We dated for what was almost exactly 12 months. We bought a house, got engaged, and 8 months later found ourselves standing on an alter, in front of family and friends, reciting those fateful words that bound our lives together for all eternity (OH CRAP, just kidding). So what comes next....of course, "a little bundle of joy" to set up shop in my stomach and take total control of my body for FORTY weeks. Why wouldn't EVERYONE do this?!?!?

"We're pregnant!" I screamed from the hallway as I ran into our dark bedroom, EPT in hand, dancing around in my PJs. Unfortunately, I startled Richard, still half asleep, and as he sprung from our bed, he pulled a muscle in his back. So there we were, one lying on the floor in a fetal position and the other doing a bad reenactment of Julie Andrews, spinning on a hilltop, in the Sound of Music at 6 o'clock in the morning. Not exactly the romantic announcement I had in mind.

There have been few defining moments in my life and for some reason this has not become one of them. (As of yet..) I'm sure you may think this is particularly odd, but I'm not sure the whole nurturing mother, "kiss a boo boo", persona has exactly etched itself into my soul quite yet. Granted, we are only halfway through the pregnancy and I have been spared almost all the grueling symptoms that most women find while hovering over a toilet. I like to refer to this as my "karma" ;). Don't get me wrong..I've had my share of gorging on every Mexican, Japanese, and Indian buffet in town. And by 6 o'clock, I'm watching tv through the back of my eyelids, but those things aren't much different from before my sweet alien took over. So besides the fact that we have photographic evidence and a few little thumps from the human I'm currently growing, I have found it pretty easy to convince myself that we are just "remodeling" our office.

As for Richard, he could not be more ecstatic. I'm thinking there is a strange role reversal in our relationship. He cooks, cleans, and loves anything baby, while I lie on the couch engrossed in a raunchy tv show, just shy of scratching myself. I've also learned to tune out the many requests to "practice" changing a diaper on my TWO year old nephew. So I've never changed a diaper in my me crazy, but somehow I'm thinking it's not exactly the same. Plus, if I can get a Master's and a CPA, but I can't figure out a diaper..there is something seriously wrong. (This is possible foreshadowing)

So while we ride our little roller coaster to parenthood, I become more aware of the many reasons you are pregnant for half the time an elephant carries its enormous baby. It takes time to become a mother. The process is gradual. So many times I've heard how I won't be a sarcastic, opinionated, independent woman anymore. I'm not saying that I plan on losing myself or my identity in the process, but in 20 short weeks, I will be someones everything, someone will need me to mold him into a man. I can't wait to watch cartoons again, play with play dough, create science fair projects, and kiss him on the day he binds his life to someone else. My goal is to let him live through me, not because of me, and show him how to be a man someone will aspire to be. Just like his father.