A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for.So my very short...but actually slightly long...pregnancy came to an end. Corbin was quite nice to
me and only brought on a few typical conditions that plague most fetus toting females. Sadly, these included idiocracy to the nth degree and extreme butt pain that was only relieved by straddling an armless chair like a slightly overweight Playboy bunny. Luckily, my crazy comments and sluttly sitting position never got me fired and two and a half weeks before the blessed event was expected to occur, our sweet baby boy made his grand entrance into the world.
me and only brought on a few typical conditions that plague most fetus toting females. Sadly, these included idiocracy to the nth degree and extreme butt pain that was only relieved by straddling an armless chair like a slightly overweight Playboy bunny. Luckily, my crazy comments and sluttly sitting position never got me fired and two and a half weeks before the blessed event was expected to occur, our sweet baby boy made his grand entrance into the world. On the eve of January 10th, we did not have the slightest clue of what was to occur in the next 24 hours and let me tell you...ignorance is bliss. I arrived at work and gossiped with co-workers as normal, but unlike any other day, I began to "train"..ok, gossip with.. the lucky sole that gets to enjoy my job for the next 12 weeks. As I was leaving to go to my weekly doctor's appt, we joked that I wasn't allowed to have the baby that night because she was in desperate need of training for her to have any chance of survival....little did we know. Our appt was pretty routine and after a short exam, it was established that I was 1cm dilated...snoring...aka, really means nothing. Richard and I ventured home and began to remove Xmas decorations from the house. Yes, my husband insisted that these decorations stay in their designated place until after "Old Christmas"...whatever. After a little while, we decided to feed the hunger. I stood up from the couch and suddenly felt that much discussed rush...it was approximately 7pm! Not realizing what it was, I ran to the bathroom and shouted to Richard that we may need to make a call to the OB's office. He replied with..."Is it something?"....oh it was something. What they fail to tell you is that the infamous gush they portray in the movies is not quite true to life....reality is a small gush that keeps on giving until a small squealing child forces his way towards the light. So as I sat there dripping....Richard and I, deer in headlights, didn't move for what seemed like an eternity..wide eyes, hands covering mouths. When we both came to, I told Richard to call the doctor's office. Still slightly stunned, Richard turned and ran directly into the bathroom door. He seemed unphased by the blow and kept on trucking to the kitchen to grab the phone. A short call and a few reality checks later...we had determined that "it was time."
Richard sprinted upstairs to get our packed bag. It will come to no surprise that it had been packed for approximately four weeks and three days. Now at this point...Richard was a wreck and I was in complete denial. Convinced that they were just going to send us home due to a false alarm, I walked/wobbled up the stairs to find Richard running around in the hallway with no bag. "I don't know what to put in it"...He may have missed the "already packed" memo. We located the essentials and headed to the car. On the drive over to the hospital, sharp pains began to shoot around my hips and down my legs. You may think that I would start to believe we were going to have a baby within the next day or so, but my mind labeled these as Braxton Hicks. When we arrived and I slowly got out of the car, the gush occured..the "movie" gush...and my denial melted away, just to be replaced by serious freak out! Of course, Richard had switched places with me and was my calm before the storm. Needless to say, we were checked in...skipped triage..and settled into our blue room.
The contractions started immediately, registering over 100 and "camel backing". I totally couldn't handle the pain, call me a wimp, and had an epidural at about 2-3cm. WOW..talk about bliss. I am no one's hero and all about the drugs! I do NOT understand how any woman does it without and they are much stronger than I am. I passed out and a few hours later, I woke up 5cm and a happy little girl. Sadly, the happiness was short lived and within 45 minutes, I was 10cm and the epidural started to wear off. No amount of drugs could cover up the next 2 hours and after some serious pain and an hour and a half of pushing, our new bundle of joy was thrown on my lap. He was born January 11 (1/11 can only be good luck) at 4:02am, was 7lbs 1oz, 18.5 inches long, and absolutely perfect!The next few weeks have become a blur and now sitting at a month out and a few labor aftershocks later, motherhood has definitely become a way of life. There are numerous things that no one tells you about childbirth and shortly after, I would have been the optimal person to discourage teens from ever engaging in extra curricular that could even remotely result in their spawn. I coudn't pinpoint the moment it happened, but that girl consumed in the uncomfortable experience of childbirth has faded and a new mother has been born. The long nights, short days, and hectic scream decoding can not come close to the cute little feet that appear when I go to change a diaper or the sweet sound of his snore when he's fast asleep. Words will never describe the pleasure you find in the tiny moments that are consumed with feeding, burping, and changing poopy diapers. Who would have thought that I would ever say that I would rather change a thousand poopy diapers and go through a million..maybe not a million...hours of labor than to miss out on a minute of Corbin's life. I am forever thankful for those 8 months, two weeks, three days...and 9 hours :)
